Love Personified.

What is Love?

After church today, I came here to my favorite little beachside coffee shop to catch some quiet time and write some letters, read a good book, and just enjoy the peace & quiet. A few minutes ago, a beautiful older couple entered the room and conversations seemed to halt as all eyes turned toward them. The man was helping the woman in the front door, gently standing behind her as she made her way up the walk. A woman went to open the door for them and all eyes seemed to follow them as they slowly made their way a few tables over. He had knowingly called ahead, ordered her an Italian Soda and himself some Iced Coffee with some hot sandwiches to follow it. They were brought out for them right away. Tears filled my eyes as he helped her into her chair, softly brushing her shoulders to ask if she was comfortable. As I glance over at them now, I take in the beauty of her wedding ring glistening in the lamp light above her.

And so many thoughts flood my mind. I have no idea what their story is. I don't know how they met, or if they have children, or how long they have been married. I don't know how long they have lived on Guam or why they came here in the first place (they're statesiders)....all of these are questions that I've wondered since they first made their way into the room. But what I do know is that he loves her. That one little statement could be screamed from the mountaintops...just by the way he looks at her and touches her and leads her as they slowly make their way back to the restroom. It is a convicting, bold kind of love. It is the kind of love that secretly, I think we all long for. Knowing that at the end of a life well lived, if we're lucky, the one we shared those early years with would still want to take us on a date to the local coffee shop and eat quietly together. That they would look into our eyes with love when we could no longer speak or stand without assistance. That the love that they had pledged so long ago would remain.

I don't have any other thoughts. Just that their brief presence in this room has altered something in me....That watching the way he loved her is more real and true than any Hollywood writer could ever depict in the cheesy romance movies that those of us on the female side of things tend to gush over. I only hope that the beauty, truth, & love walked out before me tonight will stay with me...and that we might all be so lucky.

Every situation and every moment is of infinite value.

What Community Is All About.

I arrived safely back on Guam this past Wednesday, only to be met with unsettling news. Emma, one of my sweet church babies, had been rushed to the hospital the day prior and is being held in the PEDS unit of the ICU. She's my sweet little love bug, and she's so sick. She'd been battling a five day fever when I left and her mom had spent several days taking her to the clinic, but she continued to be undiagnosed. At some point she nearly stopped breathing, and after being admitted they found out that she has a very serious case of pneumonia. She's on a respirator now, but is currently stable and her vital signs are increasing.

(Emma & her Daddy, Isaac, who has been reading to her all day)

I wanted to visit her, but always feel a little bit intrusive visiting sick friends at the hospital. From personal experience, family members are generally the only ones to visit when something serious has happened in my family, and I didn't want to overwhelm her family. But a friend called to see if I wanted to go with her, so I decided to join her. When I walked into the PEDS floor, I was overwhelmed. It seemed as though our entire church was there, and this is the second day she's been in the hospital. People were literally lined against an entire wall and others were standing in the waiting room taking their turn to see her. (Only two people are allowed in the room at a time). After talking with Kristal, Emma's mom, I learned that the steady stream of people hasn't let up since she was admitted. She said if it had been her & Isaac (her husband) waiting alone all this time, that it would have been unbearable, but knowing that the church family has been so consistent in coming to see her, has helped them to cope immeasurably. Being there tonight really taught me a lot about the love of God and the love of community.



As I sat there with Emma at her bed tonight, I tenderly brushed the hair from her face and prayed over her frail little body. I told her how brave & strong she was, about how many people love her and were waiting outside to see her. She's a strong little girl, in a long lineage of strong women, and I know she'll make it through this. But your prayers would be greatly appreciated. The boy sharing a room with her also has pneumonia and has been in the ICU for a week & a half. We're really praying that both of them will be released soon. Seeing a body that little hooked up with wires & ventilators is a sad sight, and they've got more important things to do. :) We're looking forward to seeing her sweet little face at church again soon....Pray saints, pray!

Still Yapping it Up. :)

I continue to be reminded of the joy of simple things throughout my time on Yap. The people here are so gracious & kind and the speed of life is slooooow and easy. Such small things have meant so much in my time here. We were treated to lunch at a local family’s home after our speaking engagement at church this morning, and they cooked us a delicious meal of local fish that they caught off of their backporch, crab, rice, pancit, and rice cakes. After lunch they laid down a sleeping pallet for us on the back porch and we slept with two kids between us while listening to the sound of the rain pound on the metal roof above us. We stretched our arms outside of the porch and let the raindrops gather in our hands, slowly letting them drip to the water below. Those small things are worth gold.

The beauty here is absolutely astounding to me. I have never, in my life, seen anything like it. To be on an island that has really been untouched by Western Civilization as we know it, is strange, but beautiful. We went to visit a missionary friend today and my jaw DROPPED when I saw where they lived. I was absolutely overwhelmed at the beauty. The house is a traditional Tongan house (the family is originally from Tonga) and it is built on trees limbs, so you have to climb several limbs to get inside. The windows all close but are propped open with wooden poles during the day. When we arrived, the missionary’s wife was resting in the window directly overlooking the breathtaking teal green ocean that her children were playing in. They don’t have beds or furniture, just sleeping pallets and more than enough love to go around. They tied a long rope to a MASSIVE palm tree and made a swing out of a tetherball that the kids swing back & forth on for hours. Even being there was a blessing, and to realize that life really exists so simply was inspiring.

We’re enjoying a quiet night at home tonight, and are looking forward to spending more time with our new friends in the next two days before we head back to Guam. God has truly, truly blessed our time here, and I couldn’t be more thankful. I can’t wait to post pictures! :)

Wishing you love, joy, & peace- wherever you are today. May God’s love cover you in all that you do!

Hello From Yap!

Hello Blog Loves!
It’s been ages since I’ve written, I know. Please forgive me! Life always seems to move along at warp speed and I find myself sitting on the sidelines marveling at the abilities that so many of you have at keeping up with your blog on a daily basis. I love to read about what’s going on in your lives, but seldom take the opportunity to share what is going on in mine.
I’m writing to you today from…..(drum roll please)…..the beautiful island of Yap in Micronesia!! It’s a small island, a mile in diameter, and the people here are shy, but humble & kind. I’d been wanting to travel to Yap for sometime now. There are so many beautiful Micronesian islands to choose from, but Yap has always been a central part of conversation in my life on Guam. The church that I go to in Guam supports a mission church on Yap and it has been our pastor’s heart for years that as many individuals from our church who have the means to go to Yap, would go. My friend Mary and I are here for a week, staying with a family in the church. They have been nothing but hospitable to us.

It’s been a breath of fresh air to have a smidgen of time away from Guam & away from the States as well. It’s nice to have a reminder of how so many people in the world live, outside of Western Civilization. We learned very quickly that Yap isn’t current on Western trends when trying to find an ATM machine on island. Most people had no idea what we were talking about , and it turns out, there isn’t one. There is one store on island that allows debit transactions so we’ve been able to help supply our host family with groceries and other than that are living on the small amount of cash we have between us. I can hear my mother’s words ringing through my ears now, as I remember all the times she would make sure I had cash, even on road trips from one state to the next. I always have been one to learn best from my own mistakes, and suffice it to say, I will never head out on a trip without cash again. :)

It’s been a strange time to visit Yap, as the pastor of the church we are being hosted by went off island the day after we arrived. He was wonderful to us our first day, picking us up from the airport and helping us try to find the things we would need while he was away. The church members have seen it as a time to step out in faith, as they’ve always been very reliant on him when guests arrive to be the one to help facilitate their needs along with transportation and sight seeing. Angel (Ang-hel), is a man in the church who became a Christian three years ago while a YWAM team was serving on Yap. He has really been wonderful to us while Pastor Robert has been gone. He’s been so thoughtful, driving us everywhere and taking the time just to be with us. It’s been wonderful to experience the culture through the eyes of a true Yapese. He’s helped us with everyday things, but has also done things most people wouldn’t think of: like driving us to the beach to watch the sunset, finding the darkest field area to look at the stars, turning off the headlights on the back roads to watch the fireflies twinkling lights as we passed, and taking us down to the lagoon so we could see how it looked all lit up at night. He is a man with a big heart for God & for people, and appeared so shy at first that his humor and the spark in his twinkling eye threw me when he finally revealed himself. He’s a kindred spirit for sure, and I’m grateful that the remainder of our days here will include plenty of time with him.

The family we’re staying with is originally from the Philippines, but moved to Yap a year ago. Edgar works as a contractor for the government and his wife Daisy stays home with their two young children, Kyla and Latrell. It has been fun to stay in a house with kids (they’re the cutest!) and they have been so wonderful to us. We made crab tonight (boiled it alive, a first for me for sure) and it was a really fun experience. They’ve been so excited to have us try all the local fruits and dishes. We had soursap (a sour fruit that is delicious!) and Daisy is going to try to get one of the neighborhood boys to climb the palm tree in the front yard to pick coconuts for us to drink from. Life is simple here & beautiful, and it makes me wonder what we’re missing out on sometimes in the Western culture. The people here don’t have much, but they have each other, and to see that kind of affection & simplicity is rare. It is a gift to be here.

Well, we’re winding down for the evening, and are preparing to speak at the church in the morning. I know the remainder of our days here will go faster than I’m prepared for them to, so I’m soaking in every minute. :)

Playing Catchup.

So I have another (not so) surprising confession to make. I haven't blogged in over a month. And actually, it might be longer than a month. I'm just pretty certain that I haven't even signed onto blogger in that amount of time. So needless to say, I'm a little behind. I was actually brought back to the blogging world because several close friends of mine emailed me with surprising life events in the past week and I kept thinking, "I bet I would know about this already if I had read their blog." :) Funny how life works, isn't it?

Anyway, so I'm playing major catchup, but I'm actually excited about it. :) I'm going to clean up my subscriptions, which I think might be part of the problem. For a while there I got a little blog happy and subscribed to a TON of people with amazing blogs that I never really ended up reading. So I'm going back to the basics. I'll keep around my "blog friends" for sure, and a few others that I just enjoy lurking around once in a while. :) In the coming days (or maybe just today if I find the motivation) I'm going to be going back and trying to write & accurately date a few posts of importance from the month of May. There were actually QUITE a few significant events that I'd like to document before any more time passes.

So in the time being, that's what I'll be doing.
Life is still grand. God is still good.
And I'll always be grateful. <3

a million lifetimes.

This post officially makes me cheesy, but y'all already knew that. Jenn's blog inspired me to write my own about what I would do with a million lifetimes. The dreamer in me loved every second of this. :)


I'd become a humanitarian photographer. I'd travel the world documenting the stories of those who have lost their voices due to poverty, illness, hatred, death, or decay. I would tell their stories and speak life into broken places. I'd look into the eyes of a child who lost both his parents to AIDS and tell him he his loved, into the eyes of a teenage girl who was sold into sex slavery and let her know she is precious & worthy, into the eyes of a man who works tirelessly yet fails to provide for his family and tell him that he is enough. I'd bury every single one of them deep in my heart and my mind- sharing their faces and stories with the world.




I'd open my own coffee shop with a quaint bookstore in the backroom. I'd know the names of all of the regulars and would have conversations with them about their kids, their families, their lives. Customers would be welcomed by handwritten signs and the scent of cinnamon buns. I'd have childrens reading hour every day at four o'clock. I'd dress up as different book characters and make stories come alive. I'd know the name & birthday of every child. I'd be a woman who speaks love and life into the children around her. Someone who makes them feel cherished and important.



I'd want to love recklessly and abandon my rights so that I might live a greater life before God. I'd want to serve Him by loving the unloved, by remembering those who have been forgotten. I'd go deep into the outer villages of this world and bring peace and the message of the good news to those that have never heard it. To give them the opportunity to have a sense of stability in something that cannot be taken from them. (His love heals all wounds.) I'd feed the hungry, rescue street children, and open an orphanage and become a mother to the motherless. I'd touch those that society had deemed untouchable. I'd break boundaries.




I'd live in a big city: new york, chicago, or la. I'd buy all of my groceries from local farmer's markets or fruit stands. I'd take the metro or bike everywhere I went. Once a week I'd buy flowers on the street and place them in a vase at the center of my kitchen table. I'd know all the local vendors, buy my coffee from family owned cafes instead of Starbucks, and support the local theater district. I'd be artsy & carefree, handsewing all of my own clothes and opening my own etsy shop. :)



I'd build a fully stocked sailboat and sail around the world, touching continents & worlds, people groups and cultures, all with my fingertips. I'd spend time in the solitude of those months out at sea reading & worshipping...spending time with the Lord under the bright canopy of the stars above. I'd meet new people and learn to love them, leaving imprints of my heart all over this big beautiful world. I'd stay in each resting place for a lifetime, learning their ways and living among them. I'd carry them with me.



I'd live in the country. I'd marry an incredible man who loves God in a fearless way, and would readily lay down his life for a friend. We would laugh and talk and grow old together. We'd live a simple life. What would begin with two would grow to enclose more. Our home would be an open door to those in need of rest, a place where laughter lives. We'd raise beautiful children who would know what it's like to grow up safe & carefree, who are raised in a life of service to both God and their community. We'd go fishing and run through open fields. We'd put up a tent and go camping in our backyard. We'd host bonfires and hayrides. I'd cook dinner every night for the people who mean the most to me. We would love each other.




I'd be a pediatrician.
I'd sing on Broadway.
I'd invest in the lives of others.
I'd have my own greeting card company.
I'd live in a village in Latin America. I'd know the street children by name.
I'd help cure cancer.
I'd take pictures every day of every lifetime.
I'd see God in every new morning.

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It's funny to think about the possibilities of what can be accomplished with one life. Some of these dreams are wild & realistically unattainable, but so many of them hold real possibility. What would you do with a million lifetimes?

I Love PostSecret.

I check postsecret almost every week, and sometimes save the secrets I love the most. Here's a few more from my favorites collection: :)













There is hatred & terror in the world, but there is love & unity too. All we have to do is look around us....

A Woman's Worth.

It's Photo Fridays! :)

My beautiful friend Cecile (who is also a photographer!) allowed me to paint & photograph her last week at Okura Beach. It was a blessing & I'm so pleased with how the photos came out. She is an absolute natural beauty. Her skin tone is flawless! There's not a lick of makeup on her and I didn't do any retouching on her at all! Please take a look. :)

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"Her value far about rubies and pearls..." -Proverbs 31



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We were really thankful to have beautiful lighting, which is necessary for any good photograph. It complimented her skin tone so well as it continued to set.

I am wonderfully blessed.

It's like Lucy & Ethel

It's time for Thankful Thursdays!!

I find myself with much to be thankful for this Thursday. As follows:

1. The ability to nanny for, and cater my mothering skills a bit with these little monkeys:

To play such an important role in a child's life is a HUGE blessing. To be the one they come to when they lose their first tooth, get a scrape while playing outside, or just want to be held is an incredibly beautiful blessing. I love C, L, & M.

2. Having spent my college years in the Bible belt, I've certainly experienced my fair share of Bible studies & small groups, but there is something so special and real about my thursday night young adult group. So much love, laughter, reality & warmth. I feel so much of God's presence with us as we share the depth of our lives and questions with one another.

And apparently, we have such a great time in OYYA that we never take pictures. Ab, Tab- we need to work on that! :)

3. Grace. All of us are in need of it, some of us requiring it more than others. I'm one who falls into the latter category. This last week was something like a script out of, "I Love Lucy," and I'm just grateful that I have a Saviour who loves me through it all. :) (Sidenote: This is what I felt like this week. Mary was my Ethel):

4. Mary. I've found a dear kindred friend on island in the past few months. She's with YWAM (Youth With a Mission) and will be living on Guam until September. She's become my wingman in the past week or so and I love her for it. She has been such a blessing.
(Mary, with the cake I made for her 31st birthday. I made her hold it in the car and told her it was for our Good Friday service. Hah. And she believed me! The candles were to make her feel like she was in Oregan. :))

5. Fellowship. There's something really sweet about gathering with people who love God as much as you do, the joy and warmth and laughter found around a dinner table or when opening the Word. My life is filled to the brim with those instances every single day, and I can't help but be grateful for how much joy that brings me.

(an old picture of life before Yael left. I miss her.)